IDENTIFYING RED FLAGS IN RELATIONSHIP – Pastor Dare Adeboye, Day 2, RCCG 68th Annual Convention. Theme: Wonderful

RCCG 68TH ANNUAL CONVENTION 2020 (VIRTUAL)

THEME: WONDERFUL

MINISTERING: PASTOR DARE ADEBOYE (PASTOR IN CHARGE OF RCCG YOUTH PROVINCE 5 AND INTERNATIONAL DIRECTOR OF PROGRAMMES AND CHURCH PLANTING RCCG YOUNG ADULT AND YOUTH AFFAIRS)

DAY 2 MORNING SESSION TOPIC WITH PASTOR’S SEED FAMILY: IDENTIFYING RED FLAGS IN RELATIONSHIP

DATE: 4TH AUGUST 2020.

BIBLE TEXT: PROVERBS 5:1–23.

Let us Pray.

OPENING PRAYER

Heavenly Father, we want to say Thank You.

To You be all Glory, to You be all Honour, to You be all Adorations for this day that You have made and we Your children shall rejoice and be glad in it.

As we go into Your Words, Oh Lord
let the entrance of Your Words shed Light.

We ask Oh Lord Almighty; that there shall be a Performance of Your Words in our lives.

We ask Oh Lord Almighty that You will Prepare our hearts and our Minds to receive Your Words.

And that as You sow Your Seeds today into us Lord, it will germinate and bring forth Good Fruits to the Glory of Your Name, to the Shame of the devil and to the Joy of we Your children.

Thank You Heavenly Father. Blessed be Your Holy Name.

In Jesus Mighty Name we have Prayed – Amen.

I have been asked to speak on the Topic: Identifying Red flags in Relationships.

With the Verses that we have read, certain questions come to mind especially with the Topic before us.

These are:

1. What is the meaning of a Relationship?

A Relationship can be defined in certain ways:

I. It is a way in which two (2) or more People are connected.

It is therefore the State of Connection.

You can’t have a Relationship with someone without relating with them.

And when we are talking about Relationship, the word “SHIP” is Paramount.

It simply means that whoever you are in a Relationship with, you are connected and you are both in the same boat, in the same ship and heading in the same direction as the wind blows.

So, if you are not going in the same direction with an Individual, you should not be in the Relationship with them.

II. A relationship can be the State of being Connected by Blood.

As Born Again Christians, we have been washed by the Blood of the Lamb.

So, as a Brother to Brother, a Sister to Sister in Christ we are in a Relationship by the Blood of the Lamb.

III. It is the way in which two (2) or more People or a Group regards and behave towards each other.

For example, you have a Relationship, not by blood, but by Finances with your Landlord if you are a Tenant.

For a Period of time that you are his Tenant; there is a “Landlord-Tenant Relationship”.

And the Holy Spirit is hereby directing me to declare to somebody listening to me right now: You may be a Tenant wherever you are but by the virtue of you attending this Year’s Convention; wherever you are located, before this Year is over – The Mode of Relationship will Change for you – Amen You will move from being Tenant to Landlord in the Name of Jesus – Amen.

IV.. It is an Emotional or Sexual Association between two (2) People.

These are the Meaning or Definition as Pertaining to us in this topic we are dealing with.

2. The Second (2nd) Question is this: What are flags?

It is a “Visual Representation” or Signal or Standard or Banner that represents an Entity, an Organization or a State.

For example: Let us use our Beloved Nation as an example – Our flag is Green, White, Green which represents something to us.

The Green represents “Fertile Vegetation”.

The White represents Peace.

Those are what Nigerian is meant to represent based on our flag.

That is why flag are very important for any Organization or an Entity because it is a “Visual Representation” or Projection of what that Individual or Entity or Organization stands for.

That is why the Bible tells us in the Book of Numbers 1:52 – When God divided the Tribe of Israel into various Tribes.

In other words, by the flag anyone who sees the flag will know that these are the children of Israel.

That is why the Bible tells us again in Isaiah 59:19(b) that when the enemies shall come in like a flood, the Spirit of God will lift a Standard of Heaven against them.

… Telling my enemies: Touch not my Anointed and do my Prophets no harm!

I hereby decree concerning someone listening to me right now or reading on the Label of DMC; as a Seed wherever you are right now – Every of your Peace, every of your Joy, enemies of your Promotion, enemies of your Progress, enemies of your Fruitfulness that is coming against you, from all over the Place in the Name of Lord of Host, Heaven will raise a Standard against them – Amen.

3. The third (3rd) Question is: What is the Colour Red?

Because the Topic says: Identifying Red Flags in Relationship.

Well, there are many colours but for the sake of our Topic; we will deal with just five (5):

I. Colour White – Which represents Good, Holy, Pure.

II. Colour Black – Which represents Bad, Evil, Satan.

III. Colour Green – Which represents Good, Progress, Advance.

IV. Colour Yellow – Which represents Almost, Get Ready, Not Quite There Yet.

V. Colour Red – Which stands for Danger and which stand for Stop.

When you are at a Traffic Light: Red means Stop; Yellow means Get Ready and Green means Go.

… But when you see Red you know that you are meant to stop.

*I don’t know who God is speaking to right now but I want to decree over your life – Every Agent of Evil sent on Assignment concerning your Destiny to destroy your Destiny, to divert your Destiny; in the Name of the Lord of Host, they will begin to see “Colour Red” in the Name of Jesus – Amen.

You see when God want to give His children (Israelites) emancipation from the land of Egypt – He told them to make a Sacrifice and Smeared the “Red Blood” upon their lintel, upon their door post.

And He said when the Angel of Death is Visiting the Land of Egypt that Night, once he sees that “Colour Red”, he will Pass over them and go somewhere else.

*I don’t know who God is speaking to but I hereby decree that the Blood of Jesus would cover you and your Destiny from this day henceforth and every Agents of Evil sent concerning you, when they see the Blood they will Pass over you in the Mighty Name of Jesus – Amen.

4. The fourth (4th) Question is: How many forms of Relationship exist for us as Seeds?

For those of us who are not Seeds; they have all manners of Relationships but for you and I as Seed, the Chosen Generation, the Royal Priesthood, these are the Relationships that exist for us:

I. Relationship between Seeds and The Most High God – Isaiah 42:16–20.

As seeds, when you look at the formation of a seed, interestingly a seed doesn’t have an eyes.

So, seeds are blind – Which means that as a Seed, we are not meant to walk by Sight, we are meant to walk by Faith.

As Seeds, by definition or the way God created a Seed – Seeds doesn’t have ears which means that we are supposed to listen to God in the Spiritual Realm not in the Physical.

So, God is talking to us today as Seeds that even though you are blind – He will lead you; even though you are deaf – You would hear from Him.

And when it is God that is leading you, He will show you things that others cannot see.

Many People have Sight but they don’t have Vision.

… We don’t walk by Sight, we walk by Faith.

Can I Pray for every Seeds under the sound of my Voice or reading this now on the Label of DMC; that has a “True Relationship” with The Most High God, what others are not seeing, what others are not hearing, not only will you see them, you will see further. Not only will you hear, you will hear clearer in the Name of Jesus – Amen.

So, as Seeds; our Number one (1) Relationship and our utmost Relationship is between us and God.

II. Relationship between the Seeds and their Parents (Sowers).

Now, some of us I’m sure you are laughing where you are. You did not know your father was a Sower.

Many years ago before you came to this world Probably during a lockdown, Daddy and Mummy has Marital Vows.

Nine (9) .onths later because of the seed daddy sowed, you came out into this world.

So, there is a Relationship between the Seed and the Sower.

How do you know this?

In Ephesians 6:1-4; the Bible talks about a Relationship between the Seed and the Sower.

III. Relationship between the Seed and the Soil.

The Soil is the Church because as Seeds born in the “Household of Faith”, this is the Soil that we have Planted upon.

That is why the Bible tells us in the Book of 1 Samuel 2:12-17,22 about Hophni and Phinehas.

How they were having a “Bad Relationships” with the Soil upon which they were Planted; how they were stealing God’s Offering; how they were stealing Tithes; how they were sleeping with the Protocol Ladies and Ladies in the Ushering Department; how they were messing up and down as Seeds.

And instead of representing the Soil well and bringing forth Good Fruits, they had a terrible Relationship with the Soil.

IV. Relationship between the Seeds and the Society – 2 Corinthians 6:14-18.

I know how you feel because I’m not in your shoes.

Many years ago as a Younger Seed, I know that as a child of God, the Unbelievers don’t want to associate with us. But we see what they do as if it looks cool.

They dress certain ways we cannot dress. They are able to go to certain Places that we can’t go.

So, when we are hearing the gist and the story, it makes us feel as if we are missing or loosing out.

… So, we want to feel among.

You can also listen to the audio here: Identifying Red Flags in Relationships – Pastor Dare Adeboye

So, we want to start to misbehave – We start to misdress, we start to misthink and we want them to accept us but the Truth of the matter is that they know you are different from them and no matter how much you tried to blend with them, they never fully accept you.

If they accept you; it is only on the Surface so that they will use and abuse you.

So, your Relationship with the Society and those of the Unbelievers is that you separate yourself so that you can keep yourself clean for what God has in mind for your Destiny.

V. Relationship between Seeds and Seeds.

The Relationship between Brothers in the “Household of Faith”; the Relationship between the Son of a Pastor or a Minister with another Son or another Daughter of a Pastor and Minister.

After all we can’t relate with the Society, we ought to be able to relate with ourselves. We ought to be able to find husband and wives among ourselves. We ought to be able to find Business Partners among ourselves. We ought to be able to find among ourselves People we are comfortable with and relax around with.

I’m sure and absolutely correct that I have a reservation on the Relationship between a Brother and a Sister.

*However, there are those of us who do Levels – My father is an Area Pastor, your father is just an Assistant Pastor – You are not in my Level.

My father is a Zonal Pastor but your father is just a Parish Pastor – We are not on the same Level.

Don’t you know my father is the Provincial Pastor. What is your father? Who is your father? Where did he come from? Don’t you know my father is the Regional Pastor? Don’t you know my father is the Special Assistant to the General Overseer – How dare you look at my direction?

Matthew 19:3-11 – There should be none among us who carry the Spirit of being Gay. There should be none of us who tolerate the Spirit of homosexuality – This is where the Red Flags come in.

Jesus is saying God does not support divorce but when you see a “Red Flag of Sexual Immorality”, it means there is danger ahead.

It means you have to stop and be ye separate – Matthew 19:9.

This is not a Message for “Ordinary Youth” but for you Seeds.

Seeds who have been Grounded in the Word of God, in the Doctrine of Heaven and for God you stand for.

This is to let you know this is a “Red Flag” that you watch out for in a Relationship: You are to flee from any appearance of evil not just evil alone but appearance of evil.

VI. Relationship between Seeds and Weeds – Matthew 13:24-25.

There are Seeds and there are Weeds.

Romans 6:11-12.

My Brothers and Sisters, how do you recognise Weeds?

A Weed is that which looks like you, sounds like you, talks like you, says all the right things but every intention is to cause you to sin.

They will lure you in a slight manner – Let’s go to that Party after all: All works and no Play will make Jack a dull boy.

We would go there, we would not drink – Let us just go, so that they won’t consider us dull.

Afterall how do we reach the world if we don’t go to the world?

Afterall the Bible says: Go ye into the world and win Souls for me.

Afterall the Bible says: You should accept them as they are.

The first thing to do is to ensure you do not do what they are doing.

It is the first step so that they won’t take you in the direction of sin.

So, when you see such a thing that is a Red Flag.

5. Now, the fifth (5th) Question is: What are some of the Red Flags to watch for?*

… I’m glad you ask that question.

I. Husband and wife that are happily married but you have a Password on your Phone – The husband does not know the Password of the wife and the wife doesn’t know the Password of the wife.

This is the red flag.

The Purpose of Password is that your Phone doesn’t fall into the hands of those who are not within the “Spheres of your Relationships” – So that they don’t abuse it and that if your phone is missing or lost or stolen your information is kept.

But if between husband and wife, you have a Password and none of the Spouse knows the Password – That is a Red Flag.

II. A Phone Call comes in and you walk away to receive it in a corner.

My Brothers and Sisters; this is a Red Flag.

Who are they talking to that they can’t talk to in your Presence? What are they talking about that you can’t hear?

Unless they are Planning a surprise Birthday Party for you or alternatively if there is no surprise that is Good for you there, then every other surprises is a bad surprise.

You must be Part and Parcel of that Phone Call.

How do I know that I have learnt from my own Sowers – Our father and mother in the Lord?

There is No Phone Calls that they take that Daddy or Mummy would not put in Loud Speaker so that each other can hear of what is ongoing in that Conversation.

III. When you call your Significant Other, you are in a Relationship with and all of a sudden there is a busy tone. And the busy tone is only when you call.

The moment they leave the house, you can no longer reach them or there is no busy tone but the Phone is switched off.

The Phone that was charged over night but after leaving the house for two (2) Minutes, the Phone was not reachable.

After getting back home, you asked I called severally but you didn’t pick up – Oh my battery died.

How did your battery died five (5) Minutes after you left the house when you charged it overnight?

My Brothers, my Sisters that is a Red Flag.

4. When your Significant Other that you have Relationship with, is giving Access and Attention to those who are lusting after them.

We all know those who love us because the way they appeared and behaved around us tells us that.

And even if you miss it, your Significant Other will tell you I don’t like when Sister so and so is around you, you need to distance yourself.

Because you don’t see doesn’t mean that you should discount the Opinion of the Person you are in a Relationship with.

It is a Sign of a Red Flag.

Don’t give attention or “Undue Access” to anybody who want to take you away from your Significant Other.

V. Anyone in your Ranks, among your Peers, among your friends, among your family that is always Pulling you towards sinful act and try to cover it or justify it.

That is a Red Flag.

VI. Finally, what is a Red Flag for you as Seeds?

You are looking forward to seeing somebody in Church, Chatting with Somebody in Church. You are dressing for them so that they will compliment you when you get to Church – Somebody who is not your husband or your Significant Other,.

That is a Red Flag for you that you need to watch it so that you don’t cross the Boundary.

These are Red Flags that You and I needs to watch out for.

We should Identify them, Watch out for them because they can destroy Relationships. They can sink a “SHIP” of that Relationships.

As I conclude, Matthew 25:1-13 talks about the story of the ten (10) Virgins waiting for the arrival of the Lord Jesus Christ because they are in a Relationship with Him.

But five (5) of them were ready and five (5) were not ready.

And when their husband came He only Picked the five (5) that were ready.

The Relationship that is most important to you as a Seed is your Relationship with The Most High God.

Unfortunately, many Seeds were operating with God based on their Parents (Sowers) Relationship with God.

The Salvation of your Parents will not get you to Heaven – It is your own Relationship that will get you to Heaven.

So, work out your own Salvation with Fear and Trembling.

As I close, let me remind you as I have shared with you in time Past:

Who is a Seed?

A Seed can be recognized through the following attributes:

1. A Seed has a heart of Service.
2. A Seed has heart that is Encompassing.
3. A Seed has a heart that encourages.
4. A Seed has a heart that is Disciplined.
5. A Seed has a heart of Sacrifices.

And you can recognise a Weed through the following attributes:

1. A Weed has a heart of selfishness.
2. A Weed has a heart of Entitlement.
3. A Weed has a heart of Enjoyment.
4. A Weed has a heart of Destruction.
5. A Weed has a heart of Sin.

Wherever you are by now you should be able to identify yourself – Whether you are a Seed or a Weed.

If you are Weed you have the opportunity to Change State from Weed to Seed – All you have to do is Pray a Prayer of Repentance and The Most High God will hear you and have Mercy.

And if you are not a Weed but a Seed; Pray for the Weed so that they can become Seed for the Harvest is Plenty but the Labourers are few.

PRAYERS.

Ask God for the Grace to be able to see all these Red Flags wherever they may be in your Relationships with the Society, our Relationships with our Parents, our Relationships with the Church, our Relationships with with God.

Father, grant us Grace to be able to identify these Flags so that we will be able to correct and rectify our ways before it too late.

In Jesus Name we Pray – Amen.

CLOSING PRAYER

May the Lord hear and answer your Prayers In the Name of God the Father, in the Name of God the Son and in the Name of God the Holy Spirit – Amen.

God Bless you all and have a Wonderful Convention – AMEN!!!

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